Loved this....

We went from this...

To this.....

and I am JOYOUS!

We had some of the following:

Which made me smile...

We experienced this...

Which made me giggle.

We made a miracle happen....

By getting the entire Bowen Hillary family together

for a long overdue picture

My parents

My Brothers Family on the left,

My Family on the right.

A whole lot of love all together.

We started with grandparents

added some grandkids

and added some amazing in-law grand kids

and provided some entertainment...

put the Grandkids together

Tossed in a few Great Grandkids

Found Eric's Family

Thought mine was pretty awesome

(insert Ryan)  (Gotta Love Ryan)

and then partied at Mom's/ Grandmas/ Great Grandma's

(all the same person)

with Pizza, Ginger Cookies, and loud laughter

25 family members - made this day happen

(Thank You)

(don't worry Emma - I won't tell your mom!)

We ended up on our last night together at Temple Square

with Mike, Ashley, Matt and Bethany and Grandkids.

Perfect night - perfect week - Love my family

more entertainment

We said our tearful goodbyes in front of the temple.

It was a great week to be a mom, and a grandma.

My date for New Year's Eve.... was the saxiest man in the bunch.

practiced for their New Years Eve Kiss.... more entertainment

Loved this... love them... lucky me.

You know...

...my husband always bursts out laughing when I pull the 'You know' line..... It is usually accompanied by my hand on my hip and sometimes waving an axe with the other hand.  I start this post with this concept because I am hiding behind the guilt of not posting Christmas or anything associated with Christmas.  Not that I don't like the season of ho ho - I try to be positive.... but then the retail word chokes most of the joy out of the very merry holly jolly.  I love lights, English Toffee, and the smells of the fresh air - minus the red level of the Utah diversion... but I have the most serious hang up about not being able to get simple gifts for my children.  I miss those Little People years - the noise, the listening to the little tiptoeing downstairs WAY too early.... It's hard to see the years change.  I love to see them being so understanding about the gift thing.  We draw names, we buy one gift, we move on, we love time together more than things we can buy for each other.  This year we were 100% massively involved with our Inner City Mission families - I have to say - there were miracles upon miracles there.  I cried most of Christmas day at church because, I didn't see one pair of flip flops in December.  There were shoes on most of the little children that day.  Our home ward, and a wonderful bunch of Mrs. Freeman's E.L.F.'s provided so many gifts it took several trips to deliver them.  I cannot go into many of the details but - it was seriously the most amazing thing I've ever seen.  When my emotions are in order - I may post what I am allowed to post, because some of our families are protected and I have to be careful.  Never the less - Pere Noel made quite an appearance at some heart felt, hard hit homes.  That was my Christmas Memory.  Then.... You know.... my funny kids came over that night - with one of my 3 grandkids in tow... The WA grandbabies arrived Christmas night late and we are ParTaEiNg on Wednesday, and Friday, and Saturday and maybe inbetween there also.  I love the dinner table when my kids are all around it.  We are loud, and we talk about body parts, and movie lines, and random insanity that surrounds most of our lives.  We also love to cheat at board games, which will be another post for another day.  Now - when our family gets together - it's always.... what should we fix to eat??  After so many meals together and so many holidays - there are the usual fixin's.  But sometimes I want to get a little off the beaten trail... I've been getting excited about trying some organic, and some semi vegatarian (that means that I won't eat meat, except for In and Out) dishes - because I like the nutty tastes better than the knarled bloody meat adventures.  I enjoyed my soy nog... yes I did... I love my Christmas Eve Yoga - yes I did.... But with the first mention of "Maybe I'll make that meatless lasagna with vegetables and pumpkin and stuff"  I was informed (and you know which kid you are - punker) about the following information:  "Mom - we all remember when you made that and we ALL hated it!"  AAAAHHHH!!!!!!    I can't believe Santa brought you ANYTHING at all when you were children!  Here I am trying to make you healthy - no green boogers, or snotty noses, or hacking throat issues - and you give me that line?!!!!  Well - beware children - because mom has her hand on her hip and the axe in the other - and I'm learning how to say "You Know..." in several languages!  I love that it took 10 years to finally tell me you didn't like it!  I'm making extra brussel sprouts tomorrow for dinner..... I remember saying, "There are children starving in Africa!"  You know.... just like every single mom has done and will do at some point... but apparently - they wouldn't even want this dish!  whatddeva - So for our family celebration this year - I have had a tee shirt made up with this on it...

Or as Grandma June would say...

Eat it or wear it...

(Which I recall my dad doing several times)

So, you know kids... I just love you.  I love that you have tried so hard over the years to not hurt my feelings. (HA!) That you hauled out napkins full of food in your pockets after meals.  That you Googled a place in Africa I could send food. That you are better cooks that I am, and that no matter what, you'll never know how many times I've sneezed in your dinner.

Merry Christmas!

(and yes - those dang family pictures are tomorrow!)





My Spawns

A mom must take a thousand pictures of their children in their lifetimes.... and yet this is the one I've chosen.  Ryan was fighting for his life in the hospital, and Mandy was trying to shorten it my making him laugh to death.  This pretty much sums up their relationship.  My two youngest - born 2 years and 2 days apart - making quite the 2-some growing up.  This week is their birthday's, Ryan's on the 13th and Mandy's on the 15th.  Both arrived 2-3 weeks early - but have never been on time since for anything.  (ok - unless it involved root beer floats with limited root beer and the necessity to fight for the remaining ice cream)  When they were little we had outrageous parties for their birthday.  Now - I call them up - tell them how freaking much it hurt to deliver them, how I can remember every single night I stayed up while they were sick, crying, or late from a date.... (not particularly in that order).  I'm not a 'I'm going to find you the perfect present for your birthday' mom - I get a gift certificate for them to go out and eat somewhere fun and say - enjoy.  But to me - I celebrate their lives every single day that they exist - because of the joy they have brought into my life.  Mandy was born quiet, and tiny and petite - she's still tiny and petite... oh well - 2 of 3 isn't bad.  Ryan was born quiet and tall.  He's very very tall - but he's starting to noisy up a bit which is a good thing.  Each have made choices that have thrilled me beyond words.  They are close to the church - they have testimonies - they actively attend the temple, they have wonderful goals, Mandy has finished college and Ryan is right on course in college.  Each have served those around them in callings, in the community, and have been encircled by good friends.  They are known to tell each other EXACTLY what they are thinking about each other - making eyebrows raise, and hearts thump faster, and we wonder if they'll punch each other out - but they don't.  They are brutally protective of each other - I like that a lot.  I love watching them when they are together, they are SO FUNNY... my sides ache from laughing at the things they do.  Each one knowing what the other will do and or say in any situation.  They are most frightening when in the same car, when any window is down, and Mandy is in the back seat.  I'm pretty sure there is a warrant out for their arrest.  Sometimes I look at them and I see the most tender moments.  When Ryan was sick - I watched Mandy praying for him.  When Ryan was far away, his e-mails would include how Mandy was feeling.  Those moments that remind me that they have been friends long before even coming to earth.  Their lives have changed from the birthday parties of yesterdays - but there will still be cake, and well maybe root beer floats somewhere in this week.  Mandy is now a mom, and a wife, and a musician and is living her dream.  Ryan is studying hard at school, just completed an amazing mission for the church, and has found a bright little light in his world, he's found joy, and I hope he takes good care of her.  There are actually 4 favorite kids in my line up of children - Lucky me.  I look forward to seeing the events of the year ahead as we continue to grow older as a family.  Mandy and Ryan I hope you have a wonderful birthday - and that you know you are loved by all of us.  I hope Jaffar blesses you in every way... if we can find him... at Disneyland.... again... in It's A Small World....

Oh Happy Day!

Yo Momma Loves Ya.

Taa ina Wiieend

Windy day... wait - 100 mph winds - Hurricane Day in Utah!  I took precautions though... I moved all of my Pepsi to the middle of the house, along with the Oreos.  Can't say that I am not prepared.  Feel bad for those that had damage on their homes.  People are more important than things - but you do need to have a place to sleep.  Everytime the wind blows Mandy and I call each other and say, "Taa ina Wiiend"!  It's from a movie called 'Nell'.  In which a young girl is left to raise herself in the back country of the South or East or some place where they decided to do it.... whatever... When civilization finds her she has her own language - thus Taa ina Wiiend - when the wind blows she explains 'Tree in the wind'.  But it's not any fun unless you say it and sway your arms over your head several times.  Rolling your eyes back into your head also adds to the drama of the quote.   Good times.  I'm going to have to watch Jodie Foster in that movie again someday - and get some more awesome quotes.  I'm now late for what I was actually going to get to as of right now - what's with the freaking squirrels in my life???  Well, I'm off and flying.... Taa ina Wiiend... to you all xoxo

Always a good notation....

Life.... happened yesterday, perfectly.  Ryan and Katie set up the tree, Katie played music on my piano while Ryan set up the train around the tree.  (ya... we like this girl a lot)(Katie...are you reading this?)  (:  Ryan brought up the 12 totes of Christmas from the basement without being bitten by a black widow spider... always a good notation.  I went to Yoga, and then Zumba - so I covered both orbs of the workout world.  I got a Coke at McDonald's after working out for 2 hours.... always a good notation.  Mandy and J-babyman arrived bearing giggles slobbers and smiles, and that was from Mandy.  Ryan the hubby Ryan, was buried in Law School demands and we missed him.  But, with desert to die for in hand like only Beep can make - it was eaten with a fork right out of the pan, like we do... always a good notation.  Ashley and Mike could hardly make it through the door with the pile of pizzas and bread sticks enough for a small nation.  There was a moment that took my breath away when I seen them together again as Mike has been off earning his wings for the Army and Ashley has been traveling for work.  There was massive snuggling, of which I smile from ear to ear when I see.  There was, for the record, butt grabbing allowed between them because they have to catch up on a few... always a good notation.  At some point our adventures turned to Skype - where Matt, Bethany, and Dbug (Emster was snoozing) all joined in with the noises and the laughter and the stories from Washington.  The best question was from Del, "Hey Bethany, any advice for Katie about our family?"  The look on Bethany's face cracked us all up!  They were entertaining Dbug by making trains out of Lego's in front of the computer screen - Bethany's train rocked the most... always a good notation.  Del picked up some new floor mats for his truck... remember... he's an engineer, so for him... if it involves a vehicle, then this is always a good notation.  I sat back and watched this day happen.  I didn't want any control over anything - just wanted it to happen and enjoy it.  Life happens - today it happened wonderfully.  I love my kids, and those that they love.  I love my grand kids, and capture every moment of their essence.  I appreciated that they made room in their lives to come together and fill their hearts with each others love.  I slept a bit last night before working the rest of the night - but nobody at work could take my smile away... always a good notation.  Hope Life happens good for you today - make a note to make it happen.  Don't let anyone steal your sunshine...

oh joy... it's here...

I'm seriously not a fun sucker... I love to shop just as much as the next person - but because of my occupational ball and chain - I work Black Friday.  What people standing in line may or may not know, the people inside have had a nightmare week previous to this day - and will have a good 6 weeks of nightmares after this day.  It is the time that I start carrying a weapon, stop shaving my legs, and resume serious McDonald Coke addictions.  I love the people I work with - we are all floating in the same sinking boat so we make the best of it.  In the next 72 hours there will be limited sleep, aching legs, and random screaming out - NO!!!!!  Personally, my tree will be sleeping in the box for another week, maybe longer.  I will put the mistletoe up kids - so come over and take advantage of that ok?  I just thought I would share with you a few observations I've seen over the years of Black Fridays from the employee side of the shopping cart.

1.  Wearing the pajamas you've slept in for the past week and now you're shopping in them.. icky

2.  Tying your carts together with your gang sign  colors, doesn't scare me.  (I work retail)

3.  Thank you for using your own credit card and not one you've lifted.

4.  Because you spilled your hot chocolate on the sweater does not mean that we discount it.

5.  Yes, it IS cold out there in line - and you made a conscious decision to do just that.

6.  No, I cannot hide something for you so you can get it later (seriously - total strangers)

7.  Please pass over all of the spiritual ornaments, and go right for the Pooping Santa ones - 'cuz that's what I would love to see on your tree....

8.  Yep - I can see (and hear) that your child has been up for the past 12 hours in a line in the snow.

9.  If you are going to leave me your sack from your breakfast - at least bring me one too.

and 10.  If you hit me in the ankles with that shopping cart one more time....

Happy Black Friday Shopping.

Be kind to the employees - who are over worked and under paid,

and

have given up every single moment they could have spent

holding a grandchild,

spending time with their 82 year old mother,

snuggling with their husbands,

laughing with their children,

and, oh ya,

sleeping.

Ready, set, shop

... with parents kind and dear...

The storm cresting the mountains in Brigham City

Yesterday I woke with an urgency to go to my parents home.  I usually get there every other week, but with the pending storm I was a little apprehensive.  That, and my schedule at work has been horrid, and I'm exhausted - so staying home was what I really should have done.  But that feeling kept nagging me and I just jumped in the Yota and drove up.  I really didn't need to drive much as the wind blew me there as added encouragement.  My first stop was to see my dad.  For those who have not seen my dad in years, he's not quite the same man on the out side as he use to be.  At 82, his body has basically failed him, taking with it his memory, and ability to function at all, whatsoever.

  I entered his room and watched him sleep a restless sleep.  His brow was troubled, his breathing erratic.  I snuggled in next to him and I laid my head on his chest - just to hear his heart beat.  It was solid as a rock - ticking away, not realizing that if it were just to rest, my dad would be at peace.  There is a reason it's still going on and on - and through much prayer, I realize that it's nobodies call on that one.  He woke up and flashed me those amazing beautiful eyes.  He tried to whistle - it's what dad always did when he was happy.  I kept my head on his chest and I left a bucket of tears on his shirt - telling him about life as it is now with me, and all about his grandchildren, and great grandchildren.  I reminded him that he is loved, and that we are taking care of his sweetheart.  He kept nodding and trying to speak.  I wonder what he would have told me if he could have.  I desperately needed his arms around me.  But instead, I rubbed lotion on his hands, put a blanket over his feet, and combed his hair.  Beautiful white hair.  I haven't had the opportunity to have a two way conversation with my dad for about 10 years now.  I know now that all those years he taught me things would need to be sufficient enough as perhaps he knew he would lose his abilities one day.  Most of what I do in life is a direct reflection of what my parents have taught me.  They taught me about laughter and joy, and serving, and forgiving, and working very very hard, and being honest.  They taught me skills to survive - the toughest storms.  The storms have be horrid lately - but I still see my daddy's eyes in my thoughts and I stand a little taller.  I sang him all the songs he loved, I teased him about not liking spaghetti - because I think we lived off of it for years.  I told him that I was trying really hard to become something, anything, that would make him proud - and how I've very much fallen short of that promise.  I always wonder why God sends us places like he did me yesterday - my time with dad was so perfect.  The nurses left us alone, no poking or needles or turning or upsetting him.  Just dad and I.  I need my kids to remember that your mom might be strange sometimes (well most of the time) but the stuff I was raised on is rare, and one day - you'll realize that I've given to each of you, that which my parents gave in great abundance to me.  You'll be doing something one day and recognize it to be something in your past, and you will know it's now been passed on to you.  You will then be asked to pass it on to the next generation.  My dad - is and will forever will be, mine.

I headed over to Mom's house - the blizzard had started.  I went into the house and it was quiet and dark, it was 2:00 in the afternoon.  I found my mom curled up on the bed wrapped in a blanket crying.  She looked up at me and said, "I prayed you would come."

OK WHAT IF I HADN'T HAVE LISTENED TO THE SPIRIT??

I gathered her little body up in my arms and held her tight and let her cry.  Then she looked at me and said, "Oh my YOU'VE been crying."  I told her about my visit with Dad, and she told me of how she missed him, and needed him.  We both sat there in the mess of cryingness, the ugly cry.  She said that she had found a big folder of the obituaries of all of her friends, she had forgotten that they had died, and she relived the sadness all over again. We had tried to keep most of them from her because she forgets that things have happened.  I talked with her about those that had passed - and asked her to tell me the stories of their friendships.  We pulled out pictures of them and laughed about some good times.  She started to brighten up a bit.  I got her out of bed, we made some hot soup and some bread and we filled the house with smells of love and home. We went over the paper work she'd been worried about.  We wrote out birthday cards to mail.  I refiled the paperwork she unfiled, and has unfiled several times before. (;  We put pictures in a book and I asked her to write down the names of who was in the pictures.  The same people we had just talked about, and she had already forgotten. Realizing that her thoughts and memories will be wisped away as dad's was far too soon.

The blizzard was in full force and I had to still drive through the canyon.

I honked 3 times when I left - she stood in the door and waved - just as we always do.

I drove away knowing that this day was meant to be.  The moments I could tell my parents of my love for them are priceless.  I never know when that dreaded call will come saying they have left us, so each day is a day of expressing my feelings to them.

How luck I am to be a part of this family.

My Brother Eric's birthday is today - he is loved by me more than he'll ever know.  The 4 Musketeers we were - that's for sure.  Now we have Grandchildren, and Great Grandchildren and we've created our own generations of 1st and 2nd cousins!  Lucky us... We were meant to be. 

Sigh - well that was long and full of drama.....

..... and just when you think you might fall asleep from reading this long epistle without finding one bit of humor in it (because you know I can't keep it serious all the time).... on the way to Mendon... here's what I found on the side of the road near Spring Creek Ranch.... I seriously thought I had been drinking too much NyQuil.....

I get the donkeys and the Llamas... but a Camel?

Must be auditions for the Nativity Scene somewhere....

If I had seen a pregnant woman standing there -

I would have had a stroke.