Yikes... Matt is 29? He must have a young mom....

Hey Child on the Far Right....

Happy Birthday!

I posted on my Facebook post today that I'm not sure how you survived me being your mother.  You and I were pretty new at this thing yet we made it.  I've loved watching you over the years - the amazing way you've grown to be a man.  A good man.  Sometimes you'll do something that reminds me of your past - a thought, or a tease, or a look from those blue eyes.  In 29 years, you've not let me down.  Oh - ok - let's not get this impression that you were all perfect - you made your mistakes (soy sauce water balloon launching over the neighbors houses), and you should have died (Steve Thatcher's mom calling to see if we could get to the ER after you jumped your bike over the meridian).  There were those times.  But there were also times of amazement.  Playing your saxophone, playing your heart out, being the best roller hockey player out there, service projects at every opportunity, that blasted Eagle Scout, a tough Mission in a tough place, surviving a Masters at BYU, marrying that girl of your dreams (and ours) and becoming a dad.  That's a lot to do in 29 short years.  I can't wait to see what's next son.  I love you - the most - just don't tell the others. (:  If you tell them - I'll have to explain this picture to the world...

 

love it...

Thanks for choosing me to be your mom

and for taking care of my heart always.

Happy Birthday - you are loved.

xoxox Mom



....and the socks have it

Today I struggled with a little boy at my mission.  He was going crazy running around.  He had taken his socks off and was saying, "Look at my socks!  Look at my socks!"  Not sure why this was so super important, but it was to him.  Pretty cool socks - green with monsters, he had a point there.  Usually I wear my totally high hooker boots to church - Ashley bought them for me - a lovely gift I should say...

But since this kid was carrying on about his socks... and about how great they were... I decided to play my ace card.  I may wear the hooker boots, but under those boots are my secret socks....

I took off my boots and said, "Hey you... punker... look at MY socks"

Shut that kid right up - I win...

 

His parents - are now my best friends.

 

Did I mention that Elder Dallin H. Oaks sat next to these socks today

at Relief Society?  Sister Oaks and Elder Oaks just 'dropped in' to visit our ward. 

Yikes.

(and you really believe that?) (right - just a random visit)

Well - our ward is kinda famous.

The police know us well.

In the audience he noticed 2 sets of Proselyting Missionaries, and

4 sets of Service Missionaries...

He knows something about why this is..

and we can't wait to see what happens after his visit today.

He shook my hand, and thanked me for my service,

I think I saw a bit 'o heaven, I know I knew

that he was an Apostle of God

 

I introduced him to my homeless friend,

he made sure he talked to him and shook his hand.

Sam was so happy.  I gave him some antibacterial gel...

(Elder Oaks.. that is)

 

Another member said - "I don't know who that guy is but

when he talks I feel like something really special is inside of me"

Bingo - feeling the spirit AND meeting an Apostle - golden moment

for someone who didn't know much about either one.

 

Del and had arrived late because of my work,

and after sitting down I said,

"That's weird, that bald guy sure looks like Elder Oaks"

He leaned over and said,

"Um, He is"

(oh... whoops)

I wanted to see his socks.

 

 





Things that go 'bump' in the night

So.... when you see this - you may see that cute little butt.  Or her guns.  Or her squatting strong thighs, or her really cute purple top.  Perhaps you're seeing her cute bathroom for the first time.  Maybe you want those candles.  But I see two things...

First of all - I see that tiny baby growing inside.

Oh how we've all prayed for this day.  When Ashley was a little girl, her brother Matt wouldn't let her play with dolls - he wanted someone to play trucks with.  I loved Matt's plan - and yes, to this day she drives a huge truck.  But soon it was time to teach her about dolls, and about loving taking care of them, and the day finally came that being a mom was all she wanted be become.  She married Mike - and well, heaven knows they've perfected many things... (fill in the blank).  But little babies just would not complete their lifetime on this earth.  Each time - heartbreaking, each time bringing a greater desire to be a mother.  Some very important things happened in Ashley's life - she didn't sit around waiting for a miracle - she completed her schooling, her Masters, was hired at an amazing job - and she took amazing care of her niece and nephews, with all her heart.  So at Christmas - when she handed me the envelope saying she was expecting - I knew that it was really going to happen because there on that piece of paper - was that little one I had prayed for her to have.  To see this little one growing, and squirming about, making 'her' mom sick and throwing up everywhere - makes me smile from ear to ear.  Speaking of smiles....

The second thing I see in this picture is that smile.  Ashley is a beautiful person inside and out - it's obvious.  She's modeled, she's worked out, she stands out in a crowd - but to me - this smile is the most beautiful she's ever been.  There is a sweet, humble, dedicated, mommy smile there.

Just wanted to share that smile with the world.

Little Dox will make her appearance sometime around July 4th.

And then I'm going to post my smile for the whole world to see.

Sweet baby joys - and pictures of tummies - and smiles.

tonight, it's all I can think of.

OK that, and the thought of this little girl dressed only in

red cowboy boots and a diaper...

lower case stealth post

(shh.... don't tell anyone - but it's the last day of the fiscal year at my job and i found that i had 9.60 hours vacation left and had to - yes i said had to - take it - and i'm not complaining at all.  i am sitting in bed at 7 am though - been awake since 4 am when my brain has been trained to wake up - i've answered all of my e-mails for my mission, surfed facebook, stalked a few blogs, wasted good daylight on pintrest, listened to phillip phillips yet again, and just for the record... i have my retainer in - my orthodude would be so proud of me at my age still wearing it.  i have a full day planned including blood work, 2 workouts, t-on the hill run, shoveling snow, checking out the hoarding in the basement situation, and perhaps a mcdonald's coke.  i plan to finish off the day by going to hear manda panda perform, sitting next to my preggo daughter ashley, and maybe eating some dark chocolate.  never the less.... i'm running under the radar today because i've had over 22 texts of desperation from my mission this week and it's only wednesday, i'm sitting in a warm home home, ok - so i'm fasting for blood work but still i have food in my kitchen, i can drive a car to the temple today, i have a coat to wear, i have funny wonderful kids, i have a funny wonderful supportive family, i have chocolate.  but this week i also have 12 families, that i have to find answers for, food, warmth, jobs, and hope.  i have one single mom that tries so hard, i pale in comparison with her faith - so i thought i would post her attitude in a quote i found on my fave website today.  Rachel.... you go girl - because now that i've said your name, i know that the prayers will be coming in strong.  enjoy your day everyone.... don't tell anyone what you're up to - but make what you're up to worth while xoxoxoxo)

You're going where?

I don't know why it is that I can't let go of my kids. My oldest is 20choke9 in February and my youngest is 23.... all are married to wonderful amazing people, a couple have kids, or will have a kid soon and they are all either college graduates or will graduate in a few years.... so it's not like they are little kids - but by darn they are my monsters, my very own monsters.  I've been a mom now for almost 29 years and it's hard to shut that down.  So when changes happen and I'm not really too excited about having one oh let's say... move... when one has already moved and there is movement going on - I literally bawl like a baby.  I spent a lot of time giving them wings but who in their right mind said they could actually USE them?  I moved from Cache Valley to the Salt Lake Valley and I thought my parents would freak out!  But out of state?  Dang it!  I'm super proud of them but I also miss the everyday life of things.  The remaining children in the family still in Utard must wonder who will get stuck with the freaky parents!  (or parrots)  But then again - the last one here might end up with the Viper too... hum... always a fun thought.  Anyway - I've pulled my nails out of the ceiling, and my breathing has returned to normal after a week - and I have made all of my apologizes to those that I love.  And life is good, and we are all blessed, and we are freaking a forever family still and all those things you tell yourself....  But who will be there to stop this from happening.... if Grandma isn't around?  Yep... just waiting for the day when I get this call........

 

 

 

 



Me Mudder

2 days with my lovely mom - and the checklist is complete..... for now...

 

1.  Pull pomegranate out of the freezer - check

2.  Explain that "The Bachelor" is not choosing a queen - he only has thieves thieves tramps and thieve to choose from and yes, he believes one of them will be his wife..... check

3.  Change the Biggest Loser channel ASAP, don't want to have to explain that one - check.

4.  Find dirty laundry all hung up nicely... wash... check

5.  Resort Greeting cards again - check

6.  Search through house, garage, house, garage, still can't find house key - check

7.  Remove 6 rolls of tape from the bread box - check

8.  Answer yes, 5 times that I've had breakfast - check

9.  Change her out of her Sunday clothes for church because it's only Tuesday - check

10. Catch her standing over my bed in the middle of the night 4 times - check

11. Hide all the knives in the house before bedtime next time - check

12. Get groceries, and put them by the groceries she got a few days ago - check.

13.  Drive away from the house and cry the entire way home because I'm losing her ever single day that passes, and her life, and her memories, and her soul, and her influence, but never her love.

Yo to the Sunday night sit around thinking partae

It's a tragic moment in my life.  I've finally been able to open one of those Tri-flavored popcorn tins.  Next to it is a cold Pepsi.  A movie is in - and I'm under my covers with my socks on.  Could someone rescue me?  It's now the first weekend in January.  Yesterday was the day after I sent my little Grandkids back home to their home state.  I sent them off with kisses, and I love you's and little hearts that I drew on their hands.  They in return took my heart with them.  That meant that yesterday around our house was totally pathetic.  Moping and sulking.  It took me hours to put a simple Christmas Tree away.  I wrote my note to myself about the season and tucked it into the box to read to myself next year.  There were bits of styrophone from the village houses all about.  I found a deserted candy cane.  I looked at the stacks of Christmas music I promised myself I would play, but didn't - so I did, I started to play, and close my eyes and remember the room full of family.  I realize that I'm so incredibly blessed to have them all.  I opened my eyes and thought of the great things that will come my way this year.  A new grand baby, my mom getting funnier as she ages, the hysterical things that happen on my mission, plans for a garden again this summer, our first year as total empty nesters because our children have married the loves of their lives, and places to ride my bike.  Besides, the house always looks so much bigger when you put the tree away - I think it's because you are suppose to fill it with the prospects of a new year.  Today was a day of reflection for me.  I thought of the courage of my children, I thought of the sweet crush my parents have for each other.  I thought of all of the families that have a million kids... I have a brother - the best brother in the world.  Most people get to be married to doctors, lawyers or Indian Chiefs.... I have my own rocket scientist.  So tonight I'm tucking all of my memories in my pocket - and I threw in a few new ones to carry me through this next year.  Now, the toughest decision I have to make is, Buttered, Cheese or Caramel popcorn.....